> Seth Underwood Stories: The Summoning of Captain Constitution (est. reading time- 3 min.)

The Summoning of Captain Constitution (est. reading time- 3 min.)

At a Metro bus stop at Constitution Avenue NW and 15th Street NW in Washington, DC near the Ellipse sat several people waiting for the 630. Just then there was a mighty clap of thunder and a mighty gust of wind and in an instance standing before them was a nearly seven-foot-tall square jawed man dressed in red, white and blue tights with a similar flag styled cape.

Pointing to the sky the superhero character proclaimed in a booming voice, “By the Ancient Rights of the Founding Fathers, I felt a great disturbance in the Preamble of the Constitution and have been summoned forth. For I am Captain Constitution!”

Just then a yellow taxi drove up in the lane Captain Constitution was standing and the driver began to honk his horn at him. As this happened, one of the people waiting for the bus said, “Hey dude, you might want to get out of the street.”

“Yes, of course, citizen.” Said the gallant Captain Constitution. But the Captain was puzzled by the reactions of the citizens waiting for the bus at his appearance. They were not in awe or amazement. They simply went about their business reading their papers, looking at their phones, and basically ignoring him.

Standing somewhat before them, but not in the street, he said, “So, like I was saying I felt a great disturbance in the Preamble of the Constitution. Do any of you feel that the tranquility of the Nation is in jeopardy? Or a lack of promotion of the general welfare is happening? Or even the securement of liberty and prosperity is at risk?”

A few of the people at the bus stop answered him with, “Nah, I am good.” Or “I think we have it.” Or “Me too. I am doing okay.”

“Are you sure good citizens?” begged the square jawed harbinger of the American Way.

Another one of the people sitting waiting for the bus said to him, “Sir, I am not a citizen. But I do have my papers.”

“I see. Well, Hmmm. Then why was I summoned? Why was there this great disturbance in the Preamble of the Constitution?” pondered a confused Captain America.

“Beats me man. Are you sure you actually felt it? I mean there is so much fake news out on social media. Maybe it's just a fake feeling.” Offered a middle-aged man waiting for the 630.

“So what you are saying, good citizen is that what I was feeling may have been nothing but something fake? But how could this be? By what great evil could this have occurred?” the Captain continued to ponder out loud in a tone of justice.

“Look, I am trying to catch up on the latest tweets right now. So I don’t have time for this. So could you just go ponder the universe somewhere else?” complained a young woman who looked up from her phone.

“So no one feels like the Nation is in great peril right now? And what I felt was just some fake feeling spawned by the social media?”

Some old guy said, “Sorry Captain, you were duped like the rest of us.”

Rubbing his black shiny hair, “Well, I guess then I will go over to the Capital and hang out with Uncle Sam. Maybe get a hot dog or a pretzel.” With that Captain Constitution walked away a bit dejected.


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